Eudai

"Your not the one to blame, I'm the one that pushed you away.."

Right now, I'm feeling so wierd, it feels like I'm fooling myself. I'm having this amazing time with my boyfriend, I'm so happy, yet when i think of what awaits me I turn sad. I know I can do this, 10 weeks, thats it, then I'm free. I'm gonna start working again.
I just .. just cant handle more of this. It was too much, and there are stuff I want more right now than school. I dont want to go down again, dont want to get depressed again, it took too much energy from me, from Q. Whats growling inside of me is that everyone was SO proud of that I was the only one in the family, hole family, the only grandchild that would go to Collage. And now, it feels like I've let them down. And that kinda hurts.